I’m wondering if there’s anyone else besides me who’s struggled with needing others to be happy before you allow yourself to be. One of the most powerful gifts you can give yourself is recognizing when you’re depending on the state of others for your own sense of well-being and self-worth.
No one else but God is your peace—not your spouse, kids, parents, boyfriend, girlfriend, bffs, or even your dog or cat. You need to be secure in your own identity, or you’ll suck the life out of everyone else’s, even as you try to please them. No one’s approval gets to define who you are. No one’s state of mind gets to determine yours. No one’s mood gets to dictate how you feel. You get to be in charge of the quality of your inner life.
Even when there’s been some kind of rejection or offense, Jesus is brilliant at restoring your heart, and renewing your thinking to see yourself, your relationships, and your circumstances as he does. Every day you live intentionally aware of his presence, you’re becoming more powerful, free, confident, capable, peaceful, joyful, whole, and purposeful. One of the beautiful paradoxes of God is that when you no longer need anyone’s blessing to be yourself, you become an amazing blessing to everyone.
“This I declare about the Lord: he alone is my refuge, my place of safety. He is my God, and I trust in him” (Psalm 91:2).