I don’t think the account of Lot’s wife turning to rock salt is just about obedience, and it’s not at all about a fickle, vengeful God. I believe God wanted to lead her to a safe place, where he could work on transforming her heart. But her self–indulgent defiance exposed the stone–cold state of her heart, and she became outwardly what she was inwardly.
I also think there’s a lot of walking statues in this world, petrifying more every day as they look back at their lives in bitterness and resentment. And I firmly believe you have access to all the grace, hope, wisdom, and love needed to speak life into their hearts, and point them toward that safe place with him. Including the stony person in the mirror.
Equip Your Spirit 
Over the years I have thought much about that woman and her looking back. And I recall Jesus saying, “Remember Lot’s wife.” I take that as a warning from Jesus. Being stuck looking at what you keep regretting, lamenting, visiting over and over, repenting -again, while years pass by. When God does not recall it, why do we? Like Jesus said, “Remember Lot’s wife.”
I appreciate your post.